It’s time to get real and I am just going to dive right in. I love proving people wrong when it comes to who they think I am and I really just can’t help it. It sounds crazy, but this is true. I was inspired to write this article because of the many scenarios that I have encountered in my life that left me speechless (which rarely happens) and quite taken aback, all because someone judged me too quickly. We have all been there!
You are judged every single day. This is not just based on what you look like anymore, but also with the things that you do. What clothes do you wear? What TV shows do you watch? If you dare say you didn’t watch Ray Donovan, consider yourself defriended on all social channels. Do you still use a blackberry over an iPhone? Ew, a green bubble around text? Just no. You see the pattern. But having an online presence is an extra scary thing. Not only am I being judged in person, but I am also opening my world up on a more personal level, giving you a peak into my life, allowing you to judge me all day, everyday, and all based off of a photo. Why? Well I will have that answer for you right after you slide on your Louboutin’s and take a trip with me down memory lane…
Two years ago, I flew to LA for a huge meeting that had the bandwidth to forever change my life and career (see, there I am above!). A massive production company was eager to meet me in person after seeing a bunch of my videos and they wanted to pick my brain about a television concept they had in the works. I gathered my reel, my portfolio, and slipped into a McQueen dress that made me feel like a million bucks (cha-ching!) and made my way to their office, which was very “Grey Enterprises chic”. As the execs walked in, we all introduced ourselves, exchanged a couple words, and I let out a smile. The VP of the company glanced over at me and then started motioning me to stop speaking. Great, they hate me. “I am sorry, I just have to interrupt you for a second. Wow, I need to apologize. I really didn’t think you would be as nice in person as you are in your videos!” Hmmm. Okay. Thank you? I was slightly insulted so I tilted my head, gave him a deep stare and smile and responded, “Well I’m glad you’ve had the opportunity to watch the real me and now have the opportunity to meet the real me.” It was a snarky comment. As he sat back into his chair, he looked at me with a quite impressive look on his face, nodding his head and smiling. It was a short moment in time I will remember for the rest of my life. Although my outfit was kick ass that day, my self worth was the most valuable thing I carried with me. That specific opportunity was not the right one for me, but I was happy to win over the hearts of major execs, all just by being confident, knowing my self worth, and not being the girl that they assumed I would be.
This whole judgement thing inspired me to dig a little deeper within myself. What the Fendi am I doing wrong here!? And the answer is simple. I am doing nothing. Nada. Zilch. All of these people who might think this of me have one thing in common: they don’t know me. And why do I do this? Because I know me. It has taken me a long time to get to this point of opening up like I do and laughing at all this nonsense, but I choose to not be afraid of my own voice and what others may think of my opinions, photos, life, etc anymore. I just want to be happy. I have learned that you need to be patient with others as you get to know them and you can only hope that they give you that same respect, without judging you. Never think about needing to prove your true worth to the people who have doubted you in any way. That is a gift that will be given to you in time.
The confidence to ride your own coattail through life is a power that you hold as a unique individual and it is up to you to be who makes you happy, first and foremost. If other people like who you are and what you are doing too, then that is just an added bonus to an already fabulous you.